Writin' Forty

  Yeah, I didn’t get purple belt in  jiujitsu . The promotion ceremony was on the 16 th ; the test for it was on the 9 th ; I was told on the 11 th  that I would not be receiving the belt.  Was I disappointed? Yes. I definitely did everything in my power to give myself the best opportunity to prove to my head instructor, Steve, as well as the upper belts that I belonged in those spaces but the answer I received back was no, you need more time.  With a little bit of a smile and a little bit of a grimace, sigh. About 2-3 minutes into my test the thing that relaxed me the most is I’d already had my mind made up that regardless of whether I receive a purple belt or not I was coming back to class the following Monday AND that I would have a lot of things to work on regardless of whether my belt was purple or if it remained blue; purple belt was and is not the destination. That made me smile and I got to work on the rest of the test.  Got damn that thing was exhausting. Move after move. Repe

So I  tested for my purple belt in  jiujitsu  this Saturday. I’m here to tell you, that thing was tough. It was a whole thing. It was an experience. A lot of academies don’t have tests for purple belt. Fight to Win just happens to do so. The mindset that my head instructor Steve has is if he gives you a purple belt it means you are serious about wanting to learn  jiujitsu  from him; that you’re ready to take your training to the next level. In order to prove that you have to know a list of positions that he deems fundamental for every one of his purple belts to learn. Let me tell you. It’s not a short list. Let me also tell you, you have to repeat each move until he says move on. Let me also tell you, there are several people who are looking  at you do this stuff. So there’s pressure to perform there’s pressure to perform in front of people; there’s pressure to remember any of a number of positions and moves and steps within those moves. There’s pressure to repeat those moves and repea

There is an old school saying, probably from a movie like “The Mack”: Everybody wants to be gangsta until it’s time to do gangsta sh--. For years now we have people from the most extreme parts of the right wing talking themselves up. I remember, distinctly, in 2016 when it appeared eminent that Hillary Clinton would win the presidential election against Trump seeing some Texas folks saying “well, I got my guns ready!” That wouldn’t be the last time I would see something like that.  See, I don’t own guns. That may change at some point in the future but as of right now that’s a true statement. It doesn’t mean I’m against them; I’m not. It certainly doesn’t mean I don’t know about the culture of them; I do. I know good and well that if you pull out a gun and draw down your intention isn’t to talk about it, it’s to kill or maim a target. Talking is over at that point. So it was amazing to me to see throughout the past few years many people on the right openly laughing and talking about ha